Blog for the original Marty

Schadenfreude is a German word… Should warn everyone when dealing with Germany…

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Dearest Marty, my awesome Prince…

Guess people know basically that this low feeling is typical German, so they use the German word for it. Doppelganger is a German word too, as you know, and Germany’s “innocent” secret services are hiring them.  What a twisted nation. Germany is trying to make the world believe that their secret service agents are choir boys who are picking daisies. Nothing bad ever comes from them. (But in fact, the BND recruited former Nazis as agents after WWII.)

Back to the Schadenfreude. Nobody uptone is schadenfroh. (Enjoying when others come to harm.) It is disgusting. A uptone person is upset when innocent people are being harmed. When bad people are getting justice, uptone people don’t feel Schadenfreude. They feel RELIEVED that the doing of evil people stops, but they don’t enjoy when others come to harm or are having misfortunes.

I miss you, Marty. My thoughts wander often to you. With my OT abilities, I think I figured it all out. But as Germany controls anyone, nobody acknowledges it. Germany doesn’t just spy. I wish they would just spy and not interfere. They are so much worse than just spies. German secret service psychs stalk and plot against you and me since ever, and they stop anyone from forwarding any messages from you or your representatives to me. But I don’t fall for it, Marty. In this rotten world, my OT abilities are my most valuable assets. Without them, Germany would win. No wonder they hate Scientology and infiltrated and changed it.

RB was very withholdy. She stole other mail from me before, and she would also steal your mail to me in a heartbeat. She always told me that she would not know anything about your whereabouts. But I lived at many places were she had no access to my mail. That conspiracy is so much bigger than RB was. 

Have you ever seen some episodes of the Waltons, Marty?

One character is Emily Baldwin (daughter of a judge). When she was young, she fell in love with Ashley Longworth. One day, he disappeared but she could never forget him. 40 or 50  years later, she and her sister Mamie (they also have a storekeeper named Ike, a Olivia, a Elizabeth, a Rosemary, married to the pastor of all people… I know, strange…) are trying to write a book about their father’s life. They read his diary and find an entry where he indicates that he  came between Ashley Longworth and his daughter  Emily. He thought Ashley was not right for Emily and he hid Ashley’s letter from Emily where she never would find it.

Poor Emily faints when she hears it. When she comes to, she demands that the portrait of her father should be taken down and carried in the broom closet. (That is the least, he deserved.) Mamie and Erin (a Walton girl) are taking the painting of judge Baldwin down, and when they turn it around, they see that the letter by Ashley Longworth is hidden behind the picture. It is addressed to Emily. She finally after 40 0r 50 years reads that he loved her too. She goes to the tree where they carved their initials in the trunk, and there, she finds the ring that he bought for her. She was always sure that he loved her too despite she never got a letter. So sad.

The Baldwin sisters are classy ladies but unwordly, Marty.  Selfish judge Baldwin (made his own booze) kept his daughters to himself, and they missed their chance to have their own families. Fiction? No, it is not. RB was like judge Baldwin.

Too bad that the actress who played Emily had not very female  features. She looks austere. Even if older, they should have chosen a very female looking actress for such a romantic role.

Anyway, when they filmed the series, we were of John-Boy’s and Mary Ellen’s age, Marty, but I found Emily’s and Ashley’s fate absolutely brutal. I see this old piece of fiction, and come to the conclusion that some of it is not fiction.

I came to the conclusion that our separation was pre-planned. Plotted to rip our hearts out by keeping us apart.

BTW, it is being said that Mary Ellen (Judy Norton Taylor) is a Scientologist. She becomes a nurse later in the series. In one episode, a psychiatrist says to her: “You would become a fine psychiatric assistant”. Yikes!  

I love you, Marty, many kisses. I don’t regret it at all having no eyes for anyone else but you. It was a very wise decision. Many people are afraid of being alone. I am not. If I can’t be with you, I rather be alone. I don’t want a relationship that is not made in heaven. I want everything or nothing. And everything means: YOU, Marty. 

Many tender and passionate kisses, my soul mate.

Yours forever,





2 Responses

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  1. I like the Waltons.


    July 15, 2014 at 10:01 am

    • Olivia and John had a nice relationship but not the grandparents. All that fighting between them, and calling each other “old woman” or “old man”. They called it “teasing”, but I find it lowtone, obnoxious, and abusive. Sense of humor between spouses can be so much higher.

      In the series, Olivia had my diseases. I had polio (just three days not as long as she). The doctor said polio – despite I had vaccinations or maybe because of it. I was painfully paralyzed for 72 hours, then it was gone. I didn’t think I had it as I thought people stay crippled after they had it. I wasn’t crippled by it for some reason.

      Later Olivia Walton had TB. I had TB too… I had the feeling that it was gone after three weeks but German doctors kept me hospitalized for months. And I also know why: Ron was in the UK and Germany didn’t want him sending somebody to get hold of me.

      Barbara Schwarz

      July 15, 2014 at 10:27 am

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